June 21, 2007
From four stories up, the Holiday Inn has given me a great view of an elementary school, complete with soccer Field and their rundown tennis courts.
I couldn’t be more disappointed.
I’ve never been picky about hotel rooms. If the hotel is on the water, then I don’t mind a room facing the ocean but even if that request is denied I’m not going to change hotels. I’m more concerned with the cable channels a hotel has to offer. I’m in a hotel this week that doesn’t have the ‘FX Network’ and it’s KILLING ME to know that I’m going to miss an episode of ‘Rescue Me’ this week.
But for some reason this week I’m more disappointed in my view.
I figured if I’m this close to the Mexican border I’d be able to get a room with a good view of the Mexican border so that I could see people sneaking into the country.
“I love me some Drama.” I thought to myself.
You’d think a city like El Paso would have a tour bus that would take you to see stuff like that. Or the Border Patrol would have some sort of tourist ‘Ride-a-long’ program but instead my only entertainment today is a bunch of 4th grade girls jogging around a while the boys play soccer.
My hotel room has a great view…if you’re a pedophile.
Comedian Damon Wayans was here the week before me and walked out of the club before a sold out show.
Chicks show up w/ Wayans and he asks for them to be seated in the showroom. Club owner says he’ll seat them after all the paying customers are seated. Wayans goes ape shit and walks out and calls club racist.
Read the three links below and tell me if you get something different.
TMZ.COM ACCOUNT OF DAMON WAYANS in EL PASO
And then there's Damon Wayan's Myspace Blog version of what happened in El Paso. He called the club owner a racist.
The best part of Wayan's blog is in the comments where the comedy club’s Bartender ‘Snoopaliscious” is defending the club.
And then there's the account of the incident as told by Bart Reed, the owner of the Comedy Club. Bart Reed has to be the only club owner I know that actually writes Myspace blogs. Cool as hell.
COMEDY CLUB OWNER MYSPACE BLOG
I love giving you guys a window into the “catfighty” world of comedy. (* catfighty STILL is not a word*)
Burrito City vs. Damon Wayans is no where near the level of drama of say… Chappelle v. Comedy Central or Joe Rogan v. Mencia but that didn’t keep me from scurrying around the comedy club going from employee to employee to get their account of what happened here last week.
Not because I wanted to know the truth.
Not because I wanted to know if the club owner was a racist.
But simply because I love me Some Drama.
Apparently the media does as well. ‘Access Hollywood’, ‘Entertainment Tonight’ , ‘Smoking Gun.com’ have all been ringing Bart Reed’s phone to get his side of the story. Some even going so far as to speculate that he booked me this week at the last minute so that he wouldn’t look like a racist.
I’ve had this date on the books for months so I wasn’t some sort of last minute booking to help keep Al Sharpton from protesting the club. I don’t know everything that was said last week. So I can’t take a side on this issue.
What I do know is that Bart Reed has never shitted on me and it’s going to take more that 3 pissed off groupies for me to change that opinion.
Poor guy. Maybe he needs one of those white people safety bracelets I was talking about on Craig Ferguson. That would get him out of trouble I bet.
The more I sat in the club last night, the more I felt like a hypocrite. Here I am bathing myself in other people’s drama and denying people info on drama that is my own. I’ve been mired in my own the past month or so on a few different fronts.
Having drama in your life is ok if you can handle it, but when it starts to occur in 3-4 different facets of your life you become overwhelmed mentally and you turn your attention from trying to achieve a positive outcome to simply doing whatever it takes to make the drama stop.
People calling you and texting you for updates only reminds you that the drama isn’t over with so it becomes difficult to talk to those people on a regular basis until you’re ready to give them an update.
But who am I to deny my friends their serving of Drama Casserole from me when here I am eating at the Drama Buffet served up to me here in Burrito City.
Earlier this year the NFL suspended Pac Man for the ENTIRE upcoming season due to off field conduct.
And what does Pac Mac do last week...threaten to kill someone and bite a strip club bouncer on the leg.
How can you not love that?
Every week I pray that Pac Mac and some of his buddies have shot up yet another strip club. I don't want anyone to die in these incidents, but I also don’t want the drama to end. I don’t want this feeling to go away.
Am I wrong?
I wasn't interested in the Paris Hilton going to jail crap until I saw HILARIOUS picture of her crying as the police took her away
After I saw this pic, I was all ears to this drama. Does it make me weird that this type of stuff entertains me? And it's not just other people's drama that I enjoy laughing at. Once a week I stop and laugh at everything that’s going on in my life. It’s the only way I can keep my sanity.
Big shout out to the Myspacers who came to the show last night. I asked a few of them what I should do while I’m here in El Paso and a few suggested crossing the border to party in Juarez, Mexico.
I’d be lying if I told you that I wasn’t interested in the least in going to Mexico just to poke around. If we thought the ‘Missouri Testicle Festival’ would've been blog worthy then I can only imagine what fun awaits me in Mexico.
I know if I’m kidnapped that my country won’t come and rescue me. Every year some reporter is kidnapped in Iraq and our government never goes in to rescue them.
My problem with going to Mexico is that no one can suggest going to Juarez without making this weird “Watch your back” facial expression while saying it.
It’s kinda like that ultra attractive person at the house party that you want to hook up with. You go and ask one of your friends about them and they have that …”Oh I heard they’re cool but I also heard they gave someone crabs” Look on their face.
One person said that Juarez is a blast. Cheap drinks fun time. Another person told me that she saw a gangland execution in the middle of the street.
Ahhhh Decisions Decisions.
One dude even gave me a list of things to do before I went...
“If you’re gonna go to Mexico dude don’t take your phone, don’t wear jewelry, only take one credit card with you, don’t wear nice clothes, travel in large groups, and make sure someone in the group speaks Spanish.”
Any city that has a safety check list before you can visit it probably isn’t somewhere people should be visiting. But I’m also pretty sure that same city is full of drama.
And I love me some Drama.
I haven’t decided yet on Mexico. I’ll keep you posted.
Time to go eat a burrito.
Wood, Jr.