Official Website of Comedian Roy Wood Jr.

*Back in the Mud Again* *April 18, 2007*
BALDWIN CITY KS- 60 Miles southwest of Kansas City is where I'll wrap up my last college show of the Spring. It’s back to comedy clubs from the rest of the spring and summer and I couldn’t be more excited. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE college shows but there’s only so many 18-20 year olds you can perform in front of without getting jealous of that look of Hope / Happiness that’s still in their eyes. It's cool the way some of the schools go out of their way to make sure you're comfortable. Some even make welcome signs that they put up in the green rooms. And then they make sure the local publication covers the event. Some local paper with a cutesy name like, The Jaguar Times, The Cougar or my personal favorite...the Gumbo. (Thibodaux, LA)

Now take that level of hospitality and compare it to what this comedy club in Tennessee did for advertising.... Not "Roy" Not "Roy Wood, Jr" Not "Roy Woods Jr" Just... Alabama Guest.
	CLUB OWNER: What's his name? CLUB MANAGER: I don't know some fool from Alabama. Just put "Alabama Guest on the sign At least the people at the 'Gumbo' spelled my name right. But I guess I shouldn't expect competency from a venue that has a gas pump in the parking lot below it's marquee sign. But here's the funny part... I miss it this type of craziness.
Time to get back into America’s underbelly…The Comedy Club. A room full of people who truly need a laugh. The stench of second hand smoke and old carpet isn’t always nice but it’s a decent change of pace from the fresh air of a college cafeteria. Besides, the pain on the face of a man in the middle of a pregnancy scare is much more comforting. That guy NEEDS a laugh. If you can walk in a comedy club and make a man with an unplanned kid on the way laugh, it’s much more rewarding than the giggly sorority girl laughing at the college show. I miss comedy clubs. I knew I missed the clubs after I saw these two videos on You tube. Both HILARIOUS.
The first is a one Jim Jefferies performing at a comedy club in Manchester, England. Traditionally crowds in England are a bit more rowdy than American crowds but it still doesn’t justify what happened in the video . In the middle of an edgy bit an audience member RUSHES THE STAGE and pummels ol’ Jim in the head.	Jim Jefferies Punched Onstage
And if that isn’t funny enough, more audience members rush the stage and beat up the first guy that rushed the stage. The good stuff never happens while I’m in England. You only need to watch the first 45-60 seconds of this clip to get the full effect. The rest of this video is a bit of a declining action. The second video is comedy GOLD.
Bill Burr's Philadelphia Rant	It’s comedian Bill Burr GOING OFF on a crowd in Philadelphia during of those large 5-6 comic arena shows. With credits like Letterman, Chappelle’s Show, & Comedy Central under his belt, Bill is far from an amateur but the crowd booed him like he was one.
Every Comedian before Bill was booed so his fate was no different. But rather than bail out and leave the stage early like the comics before him…BILL BURR STOOD HIS GROUND. Bill abandoned his material and proceeded to curse the crowd out for the duration of his contracted 11-minute set. He ripped the crowd, He ripped the city of Philadelphia. He even cursed the Liberty Bell. What was hilarious was how he’d tear the crowd a new asshole for about 60 seconds, stop and call out how much time he had left, and then go back to tearing into the crowd. Here’s a few of Bill’s gems from the video…. 00:07- “I hope your mother has herpes in the center of her asshole” 01:41- “F---king Rocky is your hero? The whole pride of your city is built around a guy that doesn’t f-----king exist. Joe Frasier is actually from here but he’s black and you can’t f—king deal with it so you make a f----king statue of a fictional Italian you stupid Philly cheese eating jackasses.” 02:18- “Donovan McNabb! I hope he snaps both his f---king ankles” 03:25- “Go back to the docks and unload some shit. You f---king warehouse working, weed smoking, Disappointment to your mother” 04:14: “F--k the Liberty Bell. Go shove it up Ben Franklin’s ass” 05:40- “You guys haven’t won a Super Bowl since they had facemasks” 05:55- “I can’t believe I ironed my shirt for this shit” 06:50- “I’m going to finish my set by flinging this mic stand into the crowd, I hope I hit a baby in the f----king head” This was the greatest comedy meltdown this side of Michael Richards and all I could think while watching this video was .. ”This would’ve never happened to me while on a college gig at Utah A&M.” I don’t ever wish to be booed by 14,000 people but there was part of me that appreciates the instant disapproval of the comedy club crowd. You say something crazy in a club , someone boo’s or they come up on stage and punch you. It’s an immediate system of checks and balances. It’s not like these college shows where you do a joke and no one laughs and then 4 days later you get an e-mail from your manager saying that the college didn’t like you. Or the campus big wigs didn’t approve of whatever joke it is you did.
	Perfect example… I did a show at Boise State University only to discover 3 days later some campus paper that RIPPED my performance. The writer called me a “racist, Notorious, unprepared, inappropriate” and a few other phrases.
CLICK HERE TO READ THE ARTICLE The article pissed me off, not because he ripped apart my show, but because he wasn’t man enough to get a quote from me about my performance NOR did he bother to get a quote from anyone who attended the show. I understand that as an entertainer I open myself to criticism but when you decide to criticize me then it's only fair that I or the people who enjoy my show be allowed to defend my comedy. If he felt I was racist and notorious then a good reporter would’ve gathered reaction quotes from the crowd. But he probably couldn’t have found anyone to hate on me because EVERYONE WAS LAUGHING! The article was bad journalism from top to bottom. It teetered from news report to editorial every other paragraph. There’s nothing wrong with either but an article that contains both elements is poor journalism. I told him that in a nice 7-page Microsoft Word letter. That e-mail went without a reply and that pissed me off more than the actual article. Here this man is criticizing my work, and he can’t respond to me criticizing his. His non-response only confirmed my thoughts that he was a coward who hated my show but was too crappy of a journalist to find someone in the crowd who concurred with him. I would’ve rathered him just come up on the stage and punch me than write a cowardly article. I would’ve rathered him boo and heckle me so that I could go into a Bill Burresuqe rant from the stage. I’m just rambling. I’m sure somewhere around September I’ll be sick of comedy clubs and eager to get back to the colleges. I’ll be writing a blog talking about how I miss the unorganized step shows and the crappy joke contests they have at the end of College comedy events. Contests where students spit comedy gold such as… What do you call a lesbian dinosaur….A Lickalotapus What do gay horses eat?…(gay voice) hhhhhaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy Pretty soon I’ll be ready It’s back to the clubs. Back to the dungeons that made me. Bring me your tired, your poor, your huddle masses yearning to breathe 2^nd hand smoke while eating $4 Nachos. Coming soon to your town this summer…. The Alabama Guest. “Back in the mud again and I confess. I’m so happy here”- Bubba Sparxxx Wood, Jr.