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NOTICE: Clyde's advice is just that...advice. Honest advice but still, it's just advice. So if you're stupid enough to go out and do anything that a damn imaginary goat told you to do then you deserve whatever's coming to you. None the less, the good people at Roywoodjr.com are not responsible. Email Clyde at: askclyde@aol.com |
| Q:Dear Clyde --- Why is err'body getting jealous of me? I got a Ipod, I got a Motorola RAZR cell phone, I got a brand new digital camera, and I got the 2001 Ford Focus EX. I also got three different pairs of alligator shoes too. I'm a college graduate and I got a college degree. I'm about to go back to graduate school and get me a Masters to. Do I have too many things to make people jealous? | |
| RONALD- NORMAN, OK | |
| A: RONALD- One thing I'm sure you don't got... is a degree in English. P.S. No one in America is jealous of a Ford Focus. | |
| CLYDE. | |
| Q:Dear Clyde --- I'm 34-years old. My boyfriend of a year and a half has just told me that he doesn't want kids. When we first started dating I made it clear that I wanted to be married and with a child by 40. "Steve" just recently got a job after being unemployed for almost 2 years. He's intent on just working hard and not starting a family. Clyde I'm devastated. I want children so badly but it seems that Steve is not on the same page as me. I'm thinking about leaving him, what should I do? | |
| READY FOR KIDS- JOLIET, IL | |
| A: -
DEAR READY, l think the more important question here is, why are you trying to start a family with a man who's only 3 months removed from unemployment? Is the husband pool that dry up there in Joliet that you have to get the men as soon as they walk out of the unemployment office? Fatherhood is a big responsibility. And the last thing that poor bastard needs is you getting pregnant and then leaving him for a man who's held down a job for 6-7 months. Or as women like you call them...a baller.
You'll then put Steve on child support and take half of what he gets on his new job. And besides, let's be real about it, a woman that would date a man fresh off of unemployment, probably isn't a woman that most men want carrying their kids. Which explains why you're 34 and not married and no child. |
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| CLYDE. | |
| Q:Dear Clyde ---
During my wedding 8 years ago I had a STRICT no kids policy at my wedding reception. My sister insisted on bringing her five children to the reception. For the entire night I fielded complaints from other wedding guests who felt that this was an unfair. My sister travelled 3,000 miles to be in my wedding and I felt like I owed her that.
My sister is getting married in 2 months and she has implemented the same policy for her reception. She even said that I can't bring my kids even thought I ALLOWED HER TO BRING HERS TO MY WEDDING ! This isn't fair Clyde what should I do? |
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| OCALA, FL | |
| A:- Two words, Nyquil and Tazers. Kids are wonderful but it sucks that they can sometimes prevent us adults from enjoying life. Wedding receptions are an opportunity for you to guzzle free booze and food. Take the kids with you to the wedding but leave them in the hotel room and give them nyquil. 4-5 shots each. this should keep them sleep long enough for you to go and enjoy yourself. | |
| CLYDE. | |
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